You'll never guess it so I'd better tell you. More and more Messrs Gary Lineker, Alan Hanson and Mark Lawrenson are reminding me of the three witches Bill wrote about in Macbeth.
Presenter Lineker and the two pundits sit around the table cackling away to themselves just as the witches did around their pot.
And watching the sporting trio giggling away like schoolgirls at their "witty" remarks is starting to get on my chest hairs big time.
All three must have degrees in banality. On Sunday evening, they told us that Liverpool now have a chance of winning the Premier League this season.
Doh! It never dawned on me that Liverpool could do that. Top of the league with half the season completed. Now why couldn't I have worked that out for myself?
Do they ever say anything that isn't blatantly obvious? Steven Gerrard and his team, they told us, played very well at St James' Park but Newcastle defended poorly. Oh. Well that explains why Liverpool rattled in five goals to Newcastle's one.
And that's what Match Of The Day has become recently - an insult to the intelligence of the viewers.
If you're going to have pundits why do they all have to be former players? Wouldn't it be more interesting to have one home supporter and one away supporter after every match giving their views on what they had just witnessed?
And as for permanently grinning presenter Lineker, I'd move him on to hockey if I was the BBC Director of Sport and give his job to Adrian Chiles.
Wit
I first saw Chiles fronting a BBC2 business affairs programme many years ago and anyone who can bring a touch of wit to a programme like that certainly gets my vote.
What I didn't know at the time is that Chiles is a fanatical football fan - well, you've got to be a fanatic to support West Bromwich Albion.
Quite by chance I stumbled on to Chiles' first TV foray in football a couple of years ago when he filmed and presented an interview with the then West Brom manager Gary Megson. It was, without a shadow of a doubt, one of the best football interviews I've ever watched.
I know Megson from his Manchester City days and he can be a prickly so-and-so with the media at times.
But Chiles had him eating out of his hand with his humour and easy-going manner.
Chiles asked personal questions which I would never have dared put to the fiery redhead and the West Brom boss actually looked pleased to answer every last one of them.
From that moment on I signalled out Chiles as someone who would go far as a football presenter.
At the moment he's Lineker's unofficial deputy as the Sunday night presenter of Match Of The Day 2 when the majority of the Premier League matches take place on Saturday.
It's time the BBC promoted Chiles to the No 1 berth and sent Lineker packing to grin at some other sports fans.
And while I've got my axe out, could I implore Sky TV to switch that Scottish twit Andy Gray from football to crown green bowls.
Nobody on television infuriates me as much as Gray. He's got an ego the size of the Eiffel Tower and never have I heard anyone so self- opinionated.
Worst of all Gray seems to have got it in for the Blessed Blues. Do you know he even had the cheek to criticise Robinho on Sunday!
Just think of it, Match Of The Day without Lineker, Hanson and Lawrenson and Sky Sports without Gray.
That would make a liverish old hack a happy man.
Tweet
Comments
Login or Register to comment
Couldn't agree more; it's about time the BBC dumped Lineker, Shearer & the Scouse Mafia anyway - if Shearer & Lawrenson become any more smug, they'll surely explode. For me the programme would be best fronted by Adrian Chiles with Lee Dixon and Stan Collymore as the pundits. Anyone who only knows Collymore's colourful reputation from his exploits on and off the pitch over the last 10 years might well be surprised by how good he is as a pundit and Lee Dixon hides his pro-Arsenal sentiments pretty well. James Richardson, formerly of Football Italia and currently slumming it on Setanta could also do a good job.
I agree, Paul. Lineker, Hansen, Lawrenson are all from pretty much the same era. I feel they are behind the curve with modern football. You can just tell SAF and the other big managers laugh at them with their dumb questions.
Its only a slight digression for me to say that intelligence rather than raw motivational passion seems to win games these days (or else Keegan would be still in business and someone would be dusting down Ron Atkinson) - look at Benitez, Ferguson, Hodgson, Wenger, Moyes, O'Neill and, indeed, Mark Hughes. Perhaps our BBC friends just don't have enough grey matter for the modern game??
And didn't Ian Wright say something similar?
I agree 100% Lineker sits on his cosy chair like a smug little schoolboy surrounded by Hansen ( a scot commenting on English football)and Lawrenson his two little playmates. I am sure it doesnt need what is usually 5 people making comments on a single game. People in the real world are losing their jobs while these overpaid and overrated people rake in the cash for a few minutes on our screens.