WOMEN are using the bedroom to gain the upper hand in relationships but are not necessarily satisfied when they get there, according to a study published today.
Modern living has meant around half the women questioned in a poll said they were often too tired for sex.
Yet even when they are in the mood, 40% admitted refusing sex with their partner because they were angry with them and 19% did the same "to be in control".
This decision to hold back could be due to the fact many women feel unsatisfied between the sheets.
Half the 1,003 women aged 18 to 64 questioned for Good Housekeeping magazine said they wanted more romance during sex.
The results have led to the conclusion some women are exploiting their influence in the bedroom.
Professor Raj Persaud, a consultant psychiatrist who analysed the findings, said: "Women may feel they don't get enough control over their work, they're put upon by colleagues, they feel guilty about not being a better mother.
"But the bedroom is the one place where they can regain control. They can say `yes' or they can say `no'.
"This survey suggests that withholding sex is a tactic in the power battle between the sexes."
Better sex
Yet better sex is not the route to a better life for the majority of women.
Just 8% of those questioned said it would make them happier, way behind the 40% who would plump for a dream house.
Being their ideal weight would ensure happiness for 46% of the sample - a figure rising to 53% among 18 to 24-year-olds.
And it seems sex it far from women's minds when they have time to spare.
Almost three out of 10 of the women polled would arrange to see a friend if they had an extra hour in the day, 19% would go shopping, and just 16% would make love.
However, the research found a worrying number of women have turned to less wholesome pursuits to try to make themselves happier.
More than one in five admit drinking alcohol to excess in an attempt to improve matters, 15% said they had "seriously" overeaten for the same reason, 38% had spent "recklessly" when shopping and 13% had taken anti-depressants.
Lindsay Nicholson, editor-in-chief of Good Housekeeping, said: "The magazine constantly addresses issues with practical guidance and solutions. This includes sex, love and relationships."
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Me, Everywhere (15/09/2004 at 01:39)
I'm not sure who wrote this, but it is someone who thinks sex is first and foremost to anything else in life. *sigh* There are too many people out there like that. In any event, the idea that better sex is going to solve other problems that are leading to the lack of sex is, at best, amusing.
People say women withhold sex as if they are obligated to perform and are backing out of a contract. I say, if women aren't in the mood, there are several reasons, and most of them have nothing whatsoever to do with sex. A lot of it has to do with the repulsive compulsion men seem to have with sex, reducing it to an animalistic act rather than an act of love. Perhaps if men would quit thinking 90% of the time with their little heads, their little heads would get a little more action and be thanking their big heads.