Steve Manford smiles: "I suggest everyone pitches their tent on the roof of Big Hands. It'll make the perfect campsite. You really won't want to miss a minute of this year's Festival of Briton, I promise you...''
He may sound like he's jesting, but chances are, Steve isn't.
As one of Manchester music's most enduring gig promoters, he's staged more ace local gigs than The Magic Numbers have had hot dinners, and can quite reasonably lay claim to the venerable title of Manc music's very own Michael Eavis (albeit much camper and with stranger taste in clothes).
And from Wednesday, Steve and his business partner Heather stage their very own urban equivalent to Glastonbury - the Festival Of Briton at Big Hands.
In The City
Taking place just over a week after the In The City music convention, the timing of Festival Of Briton is entirely deliberate and apposite.
Steve and Heather perceive Festival Of Briton not as a reaction to In The City, more as a neat cultural counterpoint to last week's frantic activity.
If In The City is mostly focused around the `industry' and which bands might be the "next big thing'', Festival of Briton is more concerned with promoting underground, subterranean Manchester: ie, fledgling bands who are lurking on the fringes, or simply bands who might be considered that bit too "idiosyncratic'' for public consumption.
It's no real surprise that acts as diverse and eccentric as I Am Kloot or Mum And Dad made their gig debuts at Festival Of Briton.
Steve argues: "The fundamental difference between us and In The City, is that In The City is an industry function. Their whole purpose is to gather as many music industry idiots together as possible. The Festival Of Briton is more of a party for all the mad Manc music people who are here all year round. It's really a show of strength.''
Drunk
He grins: "And a good excuse to get drunk!''
The first Festival Of Briton took place in 1999, taking its name from the venue where it started - the Briton's Protection pub. Back then, nearly a decade ago in the bleak wilderness of post-Britpop, Manchester live music was at a lowly nadir and independent gung-ho music promoters like Steve were in short supply.
Unmotivated by business clout (he claims never have made a penny from the festival), and with all his fervour concentrated on encouraging untapped Manc music talents, Steve and the festival have gone from strength to strength.
Indeed, there's a strong argument that Steve helped lay the Do-it-Yourself punk promoter foundations of club nights such as Akoustik Anarkhy and Blowout.
Steve enthuses: "The spirit of Festival Of Briton is all about encouraging the freaks in Manchester music. I've never been very elitist about the bands we pick. There are so many bands on the Manchester music underground, who get neglected by gig promoters because perhaps they're too strange or they're not very profitable.
"We're here to fight that money-making mentality. If we have a legacy, I'd like to think we put the soul back into Manchester music when it needed it.''
Legacy
But as ever, Steve would rather focus on the future rather than ponder on that heady legacy. This year's event promises to their most spirited and freewheeling yet.
Starting on Wednesday, it kicks off with a set from the much-tipped Movement, and continues until Saturday with an assortment of top local acts, including Black Basque, Stranger Son of WB, blues rock stalwarts Indigo Jones, and go favourites, The Deadbeats, the latter playing one of their final shows before they go off to conquer the world.
As ever, the inimitable and ever so bonkers Lord Mongo will be your host for the evening.
Pitching your tent on the roof of Big Hands for four days? It's not really as daft an idea as it sounds.
The Festival of Briton takes place at Big Hands (Oxford Road) from Wednesday to Saturday, October 12 - 15. Tweet

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